a friendly tip: if you feel the urge to self harm get an ice cube and hold it in your hand for a while. it relieves the compulsion in a less destructive way. therapists have used this with their patients and i have tried it myself it works pretty well
Okay wow this is now my favourite post on Tumblr. Signal boost into infinity.
My mom’s a therapist and she recommends this to people all the time
NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.
NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE. LIVE.
URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.
<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>
NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN
EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE
PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA
NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA
REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT
PRETEND IT’S 2BYA
NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE.
FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT.
PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.
STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA
NO “MATTER”. EXIST IN THE VOID WITHOUT PURPOSE OR MEANING.
THERE IS NO “YOU”, ONLY THE VAST CONCEPT OF NOTHING.
TIME DOES NOT EXIST.
I feel like something really important just happened
(Source: agirlandhisplatypus, via herei-amwaiting)
(Source: thelatestkate, via cornflakepizza)
"MAN THIS STORY I’M WRITING IS GONNA BE SO GOOD I’M SO PUMPED"
"I CAN’T WAIT TO DEVELOP THE SHIT OUT OF THESE CHARACTERS"
"HOT DAMN THAT ONE SCENE NEAR THE MIDDLE IS GONNA BE BITCHIN’"
"THIS PLOT TWIST IS THE SINGLE BEST IDEA I’VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE"
~one hour later~
the story of my life in one post
you can take one man’s trash to another man’s treasure but you can’t make it drink
Fun fact: the blending of idioms or cliches is called a malaphor.
My personal favorite is “We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.”
I looked it up b/c that was a very familiar idiom and how could it be wrong but then
yeah wow that’s spot on perfect
DAI: Dalish inquisitor by Smilika
when the teacher keep teaching after the bell has already rang
When you little shits didn’t shut the fuck up so I can do my fucking job and now we both have to stay longer